I can't get past the partisan attitudes.
Example: I have a great day at work or something happens that makes my day/week/year, maybe I notice when I pray, at least 50% of the time my prayers are "answered". I thank God for this.
Yet Janko Furuta (and countless others) suffer terrifying deaths/suffering and no one can can give me a straight answer to the obvious question.
Why them and not me? How can I earnestly pray and/praise a Deity for my lovely day, while down the road even, there could be a gang rape or murder going on, where people are begging for their lives and yet they die?
To date I've heard the following:
-Gods Will/Mysterious ways/Cannot question him etc
-Punishment for sins in a past-life
-They weren't a good person
-It is life, the way that He made it
-Suffering is a part of life (This I am well aware of but is not my question)
As you can see, none of these are satisfactory. They all miss the point, how can God be biased/partisan like that? There is no logical reason, except one.
Maybe there is no God or Angels etc guiding our lives.
This of course leads to other questions about our existence and with all the different beliefs (Self-Efficacy, Law Of Attraction etc and there opposites, Fatalistsic/Nilhilistic) that whatever force might be at work is clearly greater and deeper in significance than simple religious concepts can grasp.
I can't escape this feeling that there is more as I've seen weird and experienced weird things that I cannot explain (Yes I know some would say this is Satan deceiving me as warned in Revelation amongest other places) and studied with Jehovahs Witnesses, Buddhism and Islam to no satisfaction.
Help/Thoughts? Apologies for the long write up.
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